Why Winter Jam 2014 Made Me Cry
I will cut right to the chase…Winter Jam 2014 made me cry. There were plenty of moments for that during this year’s event. From Nick Hall’s appeals to let God into every area of your life, to Michael Tait’s touching tribute to his late mother, to Lecrae reminding us that not only did he NOT deserve to be there, but that each and every person who had stepped upon the stage battled brokenness, heartache, and disappointment…just like every person in every seat in the packed out Century Link Center. Any one of these mentioned moments (and tons more not mentioned!) would have been tear-worthy and considered my moment of the night. The moment that spoke to me was an unexpected and unwelcomed one. It wasn’t the lyrics of a song that got to me. It wasn’t the carefully crafted words of hope meant to genuinely prompt the lost and hurting to step up, step out, and taste God’s healing grace. No, the moment which brought me to tears was seeing the excitement of a mentally handicapped man enthusiastically rejoicing with his favorite artist of the night, Lecrae, and the harsh reactions of judgment, condemnation, and mocking behavior from many behind him.
The man in question sat almost directly across from me the entire night. I had noticed that he seemed to enjoy each performer and was often on his feet with eyes closed and his hands raised in worship while he sang unashamedly in praise to and adoration of our Father in Heaven. It wasn’t until Lecrae hit the stage that my new friend (hey, anyone who praises God like that is a friend of mine!) really let himself go. He ran like his last name was Bolt down the lengthy steps which led to the railing of our second floor section overlooking the stage. With his hands raised in fists, or sometimes placed upon his thighs, he rocked and danced in his best imitation of Lecrae. I found myself smiling as I watched this man, unconcerned with what anyone around him thought, giving God absolutely everything he had!
I wish the story ended there. I wish that I could say, “I got teary over such a joyous display of child-like worship, enjoyed the rest of the concert, and then rounded up my youth group for the hour plus trip back to West Monroe.” But the story didn’t end there. You see, there were other people who noticed my friend and his unique attempts at mimicking the moves of a guy he probably considered a role-model of the Christian faith. It wasn’t long before some began to laugh and point him out to others. A few found him quite hilarious, going so far as having to sit down in their seats until they could compose themselves.
It wasn’t until one girl a couple of rows in front of me started mimicking him in an almost cartoon-like fashion that I felt my heart fully break and the tears begin to form in my eyes. I cannot adequately describe the warring emotions inside of me at that moment. Instead, I will paint the scene a little clearer…
Lecrae had just finished talking in-between songs about his past, his need to find redemption in the only place true redemption is ever really found…in Jesus Christ. He had just reminded us that we all had a past filled with regrets and sins, but that God wanted our present to be filled with Him. Lecrae had just finished laying out the need for unity, grace, love, peace, and healing within the Body of Christ so as to live out the life God had for us! He had no more begun another song when the very attitudes he had spoken against, the very hate he asked us to fight, the very flesh he admitted should still be condemning he, himself to hell…roared into existence and made itself known.
I think what completed this moment for me was when I noticed that the young lady who had been so animated with her actions against our dancing, singing, praising friend, who was even then on the railing overlooking Lecrae as he lifted our Daddy God higher and higher with each word and beat, this young lady was proudly wearing a t-shirt with the words Winter Jam 2014 on the back for all the world to see. The moment was too much. My chest was burning, my throat was constricted, and my eyes were filling with tears.
The hurt from a past filled with similar scenarios with myself as the target, the present being surrounded by many teens I knew and suspected to be on that “borderline” every youth pastor knows so well. All I could do was pray and silently cry for my new friend, those who were so dissatisfied with themselves that they had to obey the flesh instead of the One who created it, and for those among us who had been invited to this concert by friends, co-workers, or maybe family members who were so excited to see a lost soul finally giving God a chance and were being confronted with actions they thought were supposed to only happen outside of places like this one.
Winter Jam reminded me of the things I love the most and despise the worst about where the Spirit meets the flesh. I was reminded that many times those we consider to be “less” than us actually have more of the qualities, desires, and passions of our Savior than we do. One thing that Winter Jam 2014 richly blessed me with personally was the ability to see firsthand the attitude we are urged to approach God with as stated in Mark chapter 10 “…Truly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it.”
Which “side” do you find yourself on? Do you ignore those in need? Remember, sometimes meeting needs requires more than we really want to give. Do you have people in your life who you think you are “better than,” whether you wish to admit it or not? Are you, in your area of responsibility, truly doing all that you can to live, love, and sacrifice as Christ did? Is your faith child-like, or do you act out in front of God “like a child?” I have found myself looking into the mirror asking these same questions with much more sincerity than I ever have before. I pray that reading my experience leads you to do the same. Who knows, maybe we will find ourselves dancing together in child-like faith at Winter Jam 2015 🙂
Philippians 2:3 (NLT) “Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves.”
pastorlarryroy 